Why do I feel stuck in the healing process?
This question has come up a lot lately. The beautiful thing about the internet is that we have a plethora of access to products and people who are telling us what we need to do. I for one find it to be overwhelming because I have this very diplomatic way of looking at things. I often find all the information to be useful haha! But what truly works for healing? The funny, but not so funny part of healing is it takes work. I definitely recommend therapy for those who are working through the healing process. But, what if you’ve been reading all the self-help books, listening to Youtube motivational speakers, TikTok, and all these other platforms, and still feel stuck. Perhaps you feel as if none of it is working. I’ve been there too, trust me. Here are a couple of questions I asked myself to identify barriers within my healing process.
Are you doing the work?
I know it’s easy to go to this person and that person for answers and techniques, but are you utilizing them? Are you taking the time to be consistent in your journey of healing? We have to remember that this is our lives and we have to put in the work if we want our lives to be better, and to change. Are you applying all that you’ve learned from those self-help books? Try using one technique you’ve learned this week. Be dedicated and diligent and see if you feel some changes. Some progress takes longer than others to see results, but consistency and dedication are key. Remember this is for you, and what better person to give and show you what you need. yes, you!
Owning your part
I know there are traumas that we have no control over (and I’m sorry that you had to experience this). I have learned that some patterns we create subconsciously. Like choosing these relationships and friendships that no longer serve us. Staying in many things too long because we are fearful. What part do you play in the repeated cycle that continues to play in your life? Are you playing the victim or owning up to your role? It’s important to examine self (not criticizing self, we don’t do that lol), but understand that it’s time to break old ways of thinking and doing things if you want to change. Maybe it’s time for some introspection work?
Forgive
This one took time for me. I honestly didn’t want to forgive myself or other people who hurt me. This kept me in a state of anger. I thought that if I forgive this person, I am allowing them to get away with what they did. I also didn’t forgive myself for the things I did. Start with you. What things aren’t you forgiving yourself for? What things are you reliving in your head, from even years ago that you won’t forgive yourself for? We all make mistakes, name one person who hasn’t, and his name better be Jesus lol. No one on this earth is perfect, not even you. GIVE YOURSELF GRACE. Increase your self-love!
I hope that you know how amazing you are, and how free you will feel once you’ve given yourself the permission to continue on your healing journey. Be kind and loving to yourself through this process. It is not easy and often painful. But remember no emotion is permanent and there is something to be learned from everything we feel. Keep going, you got this!
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